It has been ages since I last wrote in this thing. I've been pretty busy with work, but on top of that, I've been dealing with a lot of personal issues lately, thanks to culture shock. I had anticipated encountering it before coming here and I feel like I've been dealing with it relatively well, but it's still a persistent problem that's been taking a bit of a toll on my mental well-being.
Admittedly, I've been feeling pretty homesick lately. I have officially been in Japan for four months as of yesterday, and this is the longest (not to mention farthest) I have ever been away from home. My college was about a two hour drive from my hometown, so back when I was still a student, I'd go home quite often. Since I obviously can't do that now, thanks to the Internet, it's been really easy to keep in touch with my loved ones back in the States. Talking to them through email, Skype, and Facebook has been extremely helpful in easing my feelings of homesickness.
But to be honest, my biggest issue has actually been a language-related one. I studied Japanese in college in order to earn an East Asian Studies minor, but I unfortunately didn't get the chance to study abroad. I also didn't make any native-speaking friends until the end of my senior year, which is when my speaking ability noticeably improved. And then after finally graduating, I pretty much stopped studying. I've been hard on myself for not keeping up with my studies post-graduation especially now that I'm finally in Japan, but I'm trying to make up for that by practicing the language every chance I get.
However, I actually feel like my Japanese is even worse than it was when I first got here! It could be that I was so enamored by everything around me (honeymoon phase!) that I didn't realize all the mistakes I was making when using Japanese, but it could also be that the stress of my particular situation is frying my brain. Mixing both English and Japanese at work is definitely a challenge, and even my English has been coming out incorrectly from time to time, haha.
Summer vacation is just around the corner, so I'll have lots of time to properly relax and spend time with my friends and relatives out here. I know that things will get better soon....I just have to keep my head up and keep moving forward. I've fallen down numerous times before and survived, so what's a few more trips?
